I was living in a Fool’s Paradise not knowing about all the FORKING CRAP they sneak into processed foods and Fast Food.  Maybe YOU ARE TOO!

I already wrote about Castoreum that Beaver castor sac substance mixed with FORKING Beaver’s Urine by the anal gland. (WTFork) (WHYyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy) (if you remember Nancy Kerrigan, the Ice Skater  insert that picture here) WHYyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!

A very small amount of Castoreum is used (but not noted on food labels because it’s a “natural flavor”) in NOT ALL but some naturally flavored mostly vanilla raspberry things. A little bit goes a very long way and not much is needed only trace amounts. It’s also very expensive and not much is produced. I don’t have a forking clue on why someone decided to eat it.

Recently I wrote about Gelatin. I had no idea it was so Forking Processed to a forking point that many people don’t even consider it a meat substance even though it starts as Pig Skin.  The stuff is processed so much chemically it no longer is forking meat and even a starving Dog won’t eat it. Gelatin is added to so many things it’s scary.

Fast Food is fast and some people enjoy it. Recently according to the Huffington Post they wrote about a few Fast Food Places and some of the horrifying ingredients in their products they sell.

The Eggs in a Subway Breakfast Sandwich aren’t what you think there cracked up to be. (excuse bad pun) Besides eggs they have a solvent found in shaving cream, a silicon found in Silly Putty, and a Sealant found on Roofs and Concrete. God only knows what they’re going to find in you when you forking eat the stuff.  (Forking Gross)

Another Story reports about Chicken McNuggets sitting out on a counter too long and actually………

MELTING

into a pool of liquid.

You’d think a FORKING salad would be OK wouldn’t you? (WTFork Forking worst than gross)

No!

Sadly most fast food salad lettuce has PROPYLENE GLCOL in it.

FYI Propylene Glcol is in Antifreeze and Sexual Lubricants.  This sounds like the set up for a good joke. Antifreeze and Sexual Lubricants……???

Buyer Beware when you eat something packaged.

Forking Truth

I was forking watching Top Chef Duels and Chef David Burke made something called Fisherman’s Toast and all the judges were raving about it. They all went forking on and on with someone saying something like, “It’s so good I Could Forking eat this everyday forever”.  I don’t know exactly how he made it because all he revealed was that is was toast that’s charred with butter, meyer lemon and nori. I looked all over the web and nobody has posted a similar forking recipe anywhere. I was in a hurry to make this since it seemed so simple.  I didn’t go out to buy quality bread or light my grill.

I’m guessing that he grilled the bread to get the perfect char and that perfect char just before burnt is the secret.

I just toasted the bread and got a taste of what it could be. My taster enjoyed it.

I know it wasn’t nailed but I’m excited to do it next time.

Something to try.

Forking Truth

I saw this forking unflavored Gelatin at the Super Market. The “K” on it really caught my eye and I was forking hoping I found a plant based Gelatin.

So I went to forking read the ingredients.

All I see is Gelatin.

WTFork!

Next I contacted the store that sells this Gelatin and they assured me it was Kosher and Made from Pork Skin.

In my Head I’m thinking WTFork. How can somebody be so misguided. Everybody knows Pig can never be Kosher.

This is Forked Up!

In my research I learned Copyright Laws don’t apply to single letters so any company can put a “V” or “K” on their product.

Copyrighted Symbols are

Vegan and Vegetarian Symbols

Kosher Symbols

There is a forking lot of processing that goes into the manufacturing of Gelatin. Collagen is extracted from Skin and Bones, it’s soaked, cooked, filtered and evaporated. During the process it becomes inedible so much so even a starving dog won’t eat it. Food that a starving dog won’t eat loses it’s status as food and becomes the same as eating forking dirt.

Here is how the manufacturer explained it.

People who still consider this kind of product Kosher are in the extreme minority.

Every reliable Kosher Certifying agency does not consider such a product Kosher.

In the United States almost all Kashrut Organizations do NOT endorse Gelatin made from Non-Kosher Sources.

“K” doesn’t necessarily mean Kosher it might mean Pork.

Forking Truth

Most Forking Pizzas that you get out look like this.

Brother’s Pizza

Why have that?

When you can have this?

I Forking Love making pizza it’s so easy. I do note it’s easier and quicker if you have a double oven but I used to make pizza the same way when I only had a single oven so you can do it too!

Just follow the directions for your yeast. I needed 100-110 degree water

and for a double batch of dough I needed about the same amount of sugar to yeast.

Then I added this much water.

And I waited maybe a half hour till I got this.

Next I added my bread flour

Till it was almost mixed and then added Kosher Salt and Extra Virgin Olive Oil.

And I mixed it up by hand and made it into a ball and kept rolling it inside it’s self and added a little more bread flour for the dough to sit in. Then I covered it with plastic wrap and sat it in a warm place.

I waited for it to double in size and punched it down and kept rolling it into itself again and again.

And like a forking broken record. I punched it down again and rolled it into itself again and forking again.

I took half the dough and patted it into a slightly Extra Olive Oiled pizza pan topped with a little semolina flour. I also used a little semolina flour to spread it out.

I wanted a fluffy but crispy crust so I let it sit out half an hour and had my upper oven set at 350 and my lower oven set at 475 with a pizza stone in it.  I baked the crust for about 12 minutes in the upper oven and flipped the crust on a board and then topped it.

Now this went in the 475 oven on a pizza stone and came out 6 or 7 minutes later.

Doesn’t This

Look Forking Better

than

this?

Brother’s Pizza

Forking Truth